What defines a person as a “non-smoker”? I’m not referring to someone who has never smoked or even to a “social smoker”; I mean a regular smoker who isn’t smoking anymore……
I was never what some may call a heavy smoker, but I had a habit; a routine and yes I did depend on it in moments of stress. I enjoy(ed) smoking, I have done since the age of (dare I admit) 14 years of age, much to the disappointment of my parents, younger sister, Granddad.
Despite stopping at various points in my life, I have always started again. Yes, each and every time I have fooled myself, ” I can always stop again tomorrow”, but that tomorrow never came; well it did but I ignored it. I ignored it and continued with the mantra, “take me as you find me or leave where I am”….basically if you didn’t like me smoking, then it was your problem not mine.
But recently, smoking has become such an unsociable, expensive habit more so than anything else and quite predictably I promised myself that come New Year I would STOP SMOKING….I used the cowards technique however and did not tell anyone of my resolution. Why? Because if I didn’t tell anyone about it, then I didn’t really have to actually do it and I would not be under any pressure. So no surprise then when I continued smoking….nothing had changed.
Until 11 (nearly 12) days ago….I fell ill with the flu (please refer to my “Time flys” post for further details) – flu then developed into to bronchitis….so as you can imagine the very last thing I wanted to do was go outside to my garden (my house is non-smoking!) in my 2 day old Pjs and puff away with my lungs feeling as if they simply weren’t working anymore; so I didn’t. I am still not smoking, despite being back to health.
So, does that make me a real non-smoker? Am I still in the tricky two week period? How much longer until I can say “I don’t smoke.”
I’ll be honest, I do think about having cigarettes A LOT, but realise that, for me, it’s not so much about the lack of nicotine, but the change to my routine. I am very happy though and secretly very proud of myself. I have had opportunities to sneak the odd cigarette, but I haven’t. My eldest daughter is also proud of me and that is spurring me on to continue on this path.
So I suppose, I take it a day at a time….
Wish me luck..